Falling in love

I was nervous making the drive to meet him for the first time. The closer we got, the sicker I felt.

I still wasn’t sure if I wanted him to be the one, or if I was just wanting another quick disappointment so that I could at least get back home quickly without wasting too much time. It was hard to keep spending my “spare time” away from my busy life trying to find the right match for me. It really is time consuming.

I consoled myself that he looked great on paper – he had all the qualifications I had required. He was supposed to be tall, strong and reliable. I wasn’t too keen on his photo, but I have long since learned that photos on the internet are at best misleading – particularly when trying to show off positive qualities.

I arrived earlier than arranged, and let myself look around and get familiar with the meeting place. New places make me antsy. Disadvantaged. Uncomfortable. Threatened. In other situations, I would be likely to go overboard with jokes and false confidence until I felt more secure.

I started to be noticed. I looked up – that doesn’t seem like him.

A different set of eyes looking at me, watching my reaction.

He took my breath away. It hurt.

I try to shake the instinctive reaction away. This is not the time to be caught up in fairy tale feelings. Attraction was good. It was important. But it wasn’t the only thing to consider.

We spent some time getting to know each other. Chatting, keeping things light. Sensitive areas were discovered and skimmed over. There would be time to explore those later. He passed the test. I did too. I arranged another meeting.

We spent the rest of the week getting to know each other better. The more time I spent with him, the more I liked him. He had his faults (don’t we all). He was pushy. But responded well to me asking him to respect my personal space.

By the weekend, I was sure he was the one. I was not in love with him yet. I was, however, very much in like with him.

Definitely falling in love.

My Boy